(I am back and we have some things to discuss. Can't... control.... anger!"

Monday, June 27, 2005

There is a Cleveland Connection

There are 3 staples of the news

(1) If you live in a medium sized city they will constantly attempt to make some connection to a national or international story. "Coming up we've got the Cleveland connection to the Uraguay fire....... That fire in Uraguay took 17 lives. Our I-team is live with the Jones family who once had a cousin that did a term paper on Uraguay - lets got talk to them." It is so desperate and pathetic. When Lindy England was being brought up on charges for her involvment in Abu Grahab prison thing - I kept expecting them to interview a couple who had been to England - so we could get the "Cleveland Connection". (I lived in Dayton, Buffalo and Rochester - same deal in each place).

(2) If a crime happens the news will find the dumbest mother fucker, that is still able to breath, and interview them. "Yeah, deez guys come flewing in 'der air-o-plane and they done buzzed Bubba's out building. Then they up and crashed into the Piggly-Wiggly." I swear crimes and tornado seek these people out and just miss them so they live to tell me the tale in all of their fucking in-bred glory.

(3) If you are abducted/killed and you are ugly no one gives a shit. It's true - but if you are hot then you will get more air time than a video of President Bush giving Cheney a BJ in the Oval Office. I feel bad for the family of the girl in Aruba - but c'mon if she was one of the 10,000 missing or exploited (fat and ugly) people in the US per year - you wouldn't have heard about it at all. (Same with Lori Hacking [hot], Lacy Peterson [hot], ...)


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, but Chandra Levy got mad press...and she wasn't hot. Political abductions - exception to the rule.

4:54 PM

Blogger Johnny Virgil said...

I have a friend who calls that the "trial and tribulations of the super cute."

The absolute best example of the "dumb mf interview" was a local station here. They were interviewing the friend of someone who just got shot to death in Albany. The interviewer said, "You were Jerome's friend -- can you tell us a little about him?" and the girl said, "Jerome was sweet, Jerome was kind -- Jerome would give you his life, if he had it."

5:21 PM

Blogger slcup said...

ah, Lori Hacking. I used to live just a few blocks down from her, until she died. That story was insane - it was the only thing the news talked about FOR WEEKS!

6:59 PM

Blogger Libby said...

also...did you ever notice that the only people abducted by ufo's.. look like...the ufo brought them back because there's NO WAY they wanted to breed with them??

8:49 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

And here I thought the Aruba sensation was all about the fact they can't find someone on an island the size of a city block. But now that I think about it, a blond white teen probably would stick out on a small island near South America. You'd think someone would know her whereabouts.

11:47 PM

Blogger Sarah said...

Last night "Air Force One" was the ABC movie of the week and after it the top story on the news was that two of the scenes from the movie were filmed in Cleveland. They actually said, "Coming up-the Cleveland connection to tonight's movie of the week." I almost crapped my pants.

10:11 AM

Blogger Scott said...

Air Force One is an awesome movie. Harrison Ford kicks ass. Scott, maybe they're interviewing the smartest person they can find... the world's not a terribly smart place.

3:56 PM

Blogger John said...

Based purely on your observations I was positive my brother was going to get interviewed on tv when Booher took his wife hostage again.

11:54 PM

Blogger Chika said...

Hear Hear. I live in Detroit. Same thing -- especially the stupid people. Not to mention Derrick Dennis, the MOST concerned newsrporter in. the. world. Seriousy. He's going to have a coronary one day reporting on a water main break. Let's not get started on the hysterical Storm Team 20 !!!

11:01 AM


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