(I am back and we have some things to discuss. Can't... control.... anger!"

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Party Foul

Here's the deal - if I am at a party it is because I want to forget about work. So asking questions like, "Hey Scott every time I try to print the Internet goes down - what causes that?" Really pisses me off. At pretty much every family reunion I go to I get 10 questions that are so similar I can make a MadLib for them

"My computer keeps making [funny sound] do I have a virus?"

"I keep getting porn pop-ups - I have never been to a porn site... well maybe just [really small number] times - when I got a link from a [profession] as a joke.

"Our printer gets stuck when trying to print [some shit I've never heard of] documents - what is wrong"

"I want my PC to be lots faster. Do I need a [new/bigger] hard drive?"

"On AOL .... (its just fucking static to me after that)....."

Please for the love of god - leave me alone. (I do want to answer the question at the very top. Yes - everytime you print the Internet goes down. It is really pissing off the online gaming comminity, and banks and stuff - so fucking quit it)

Do other professions get this. "Dr. Vet, my puppy has this rash...." "Mr. Pilot - can a 747 really roll in the air? I heard it could - plus that thing they do in Air Force One - could that happen?"

What if you are a gyno. Dude - weak. "Hey Dr. CrotchGrabber, ummm, I have a quick question.... I get painful burning whenever..... " Dammit that has to suck. My problems don't seem so bad.

23 Comments:

Blogger slcup said...

I always get, 'Urban Princess, why do you have everything in the world and my family can barely afford to eat dirt?' Man, that's irritating.

3:24 PM

 
Blogger Libby said...

i guess that's what you get for having a high nerd factor!
LibbY!

3:48 PM

 
Blogger Johnny Virgil said...

I friggin' hate that. BTW, do you have any idea why the Domino LDAP server keeps timing out when the Ironport hits it?

4:14 PM

 
Blogger Scott said...

SLCUP - everyone related to me is a teacher - so I get that too. "We're crafting the future of the world and we make peanuts. You make a few computers go and you make tons of money."

Ummm... wah. It's not like during college the teachers kept saying, I.T. pays shit and teachers make tons. and then on day one they got their check and were like - I've been lied to.

No teachers make pretty much nothing out of the gate - its part of the deal. Don't complain - you chose it.

4:15 PM

 
Blogger Brian said...

I think the only profession where you don't get questions would be like a salesman at a stamping plant. To this day I still don't know what a stamping plant does.

10:02 AM

 
Blogger Sarah said...

It's worse if you are like a pseudo-computer nerd, and people think you know tons of stuff about computers, but you really don't. Because then you get all the same questions that you mentioned, but you can't answer a goddamn one, and everyone thinks you're either a) a fucking idiot or b) a fucking jerk who can't even bother to help them. This is my life.

10:19 AM

 
Blogger Brian said...

just grab a bunch of scott's business card and hand them out as people ask you computer questions. tell them this guy can help you for free and is very cooll about it. he loves it.

8:27 AM

 
Blogger Dramedy Girl said...

LOL. I have a an in-law who ALWAYS gets bombarded with those kinds of questions from my grandmother at family get -togethers and I always feel so bad for him. It's like 'Hey, free IT help!' Poor, Mike!

1:27 PM

 
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Blogger lilly05 said...

It could be worse. I have a profound and disturbing knowledge about my Father's gastrointestinal system and I know MORE THAN ENOUGH about my cousins Gynecological problems, my Grandpa's prostate problems, my Aunt's uterine fibroid tumor problems... the list goes on and on. And all this started when I took my first Gen-Ed class in preparation for the Nursing program! All I can say is EEEWWWWW, STOP IT!

6:28 AM

 
Blogger Weary Hag said...

Now see, I used to have a blast with this problem. While working at the aquarium, I'd get hit with a gazillion marine life questions. Let's just say there are many many people walking around these parts today believing some mighty strange factoids about various sea-life.
Use your imagination! It's a blast. They'll all go rushing to Staples to buy shit for their computers that doesn't exist.

5:19 PM

 
Blogger Rob Seifert said...

I get this crap all the time. Here's how I see it: Each of us has a certain set of skills and experience which others lack. Each of us asks those persons who have said experience or skill when we are in need of thier expertise. Each of those asked, in turn, is annoyed at being asked. Maybe we should stop looking at what others can do for us and start thinking about what we can do for others... Nah, Fuck that!

RCS

1:23 PM

 
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Blogger Jacq said...

Just remember, there's always someone else out there who has it worse than YOU! The part about the gyno, ouch! Couldn't pay me enough to look at fat, nasty stinking crotches all day. And you know damn well they're more gross ones than nice ones.

;P

2:50 PM

 
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