(I am back and we have some things to discuss. Can't... control.... anger!"

Monday, January 02, 2006

Hola!!

Over the holidays I spent some time at the "in-laws". My mother-in-law has "cable" but it is some bullshit watered down version (missing most of the stuff I like). The first problem was that at 9pm - I flipped through the channels and there were exactly zero channels showing Law and Order!! Is that even possible? I mean Law and Order is *always* on TBS, USA or TNT - ALWAYS! I would have even slummed it and watched "Law and Order Criminal Intent" (which sucks compared to the original and SVU). SVU has Mariska Hargitay - is it possible for her to be hotter? No it isn't.

Okay - so I flip around the stations. She gets whatever station has the financial advice guy that yells at you - what is that guy's deal?

I make about 6 circuits around the horn. She gets channels 2-9, 16-22, 23-25 are all covered in static, 67-72, 98-99 total static. I just keep flipping hoping a good show will be on. She also gets the golf channel. Great that just fucked away about 10% of the available stations. The hunting channel.... ugh.

Finally I see something familiar. "Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey" - This is the heartwarming tale of 2 dogs and a cat that brave the wilderness to get back to their owners. I think I have mentioned this before - but this movie makes me cry every time. However, there was a twist this time - it was on Telemundo! Yep, Spanish! Oh here's the kicker - it was still the best thing on. It was the end (the part that makes me cry - it still worked - even in Spanish).

As soon as it ended I realized this was the first time *ever* that I had flipped past Telemundo and not seen some ridiculously hot woman. Telemundo must translate roughly to "24 hour Spanish Soap Opera channel in which the women all have huge racks" Anyone else seen this phenomenon?

7 Comments:

Blogger tfg said...

I've also noticed that huge jugs are the theme of all hispanic television. As you mentioned, there are soap operas with huge jugs, talk shows with huge jugs, nightly news with huge jugs, and musical shows with huge jugs.

I'd wager that if you'd paid careful attention to the pets on Incredible Journey, you'd have noticed that they, too, had huge jugs.

2:50 PM

 
Anonymous Pray said...

Dort!

While I admit that I have spent countless hours watching Tela-BOOB-do (or TIT-amundo...your choice), there seems to be a complete dependency on your part on TV. Have ya seen the show "Intervention"....it may be time for one my friend. Just remember......if someone you don't know asks you to be in a "documentary" about addiction, just say NO!

So putting your TV habits aside, did you really expect to find good cable in Rochester? Rochester is why they invented DVDs (an porn on the internet). And for some f-ed up reason, I am trying to get back there. Well....I live in Delaware (yes...DelaWHERE) so that explains it pretty quick.

Look at the bright side....at least you didn't see Smell Bad.

10:57 AM

 
Blogger Brian said...

I also had to sit through the guy that yells at you on some c span channel. there was another time when nothing was on.

telemundo I hear is good when you're home alone and the kids are asleep. i hear.

ps your word verification is predjudice and just called me naziz

11:30 AM

 
Blogger Oh, that girl. said...

Thank god you finally posted something. yes, marishka Hartigay or WTF ever, she is really hot!

11:52 AM

 
Blogger KOM said...

You got it all wrong - the T&A is only on in the mornings and afternoons when the little one's are at school, or are to young to care.

In the evenings they play the greatest movies. Sort of what AMC used to be, when "classic" still meant something. I figure another 20 years of this, and I may learn a word or two of Spanish.

2:26 PM

 
Blogger Shamus O'Drunkahan said...

I don't get Telemundo where I am, but when I did get it, I would be mesmerized by the shows, even though I didn't understand a word.

Their game shows all seem to involve naked chicks and bald guys.

8:22 AM

 
Blogger Sarah said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SCOTT!!!!!!!!!! LOVE YOU!!!

12:11 PM

 

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